Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Your cock deserves a montage
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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