I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
