You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I believe in your delicious
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