i don't like sucking hair
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize