Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
you win again, gameday.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?