Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
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FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
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She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well