and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
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