My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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