I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I just cut my nipple shaving
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize