did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
