Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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