i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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