That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
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And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize