Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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