i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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