I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.