We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.