We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
