She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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