I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize