I just saw a hot homeless man
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize