I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Randomize