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she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
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