wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan