Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
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