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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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