How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
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He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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