You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I touched a dick in church today
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