I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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