You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize