ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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