I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
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I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
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Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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