It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize