She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
