And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
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He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
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that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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