some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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