At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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