My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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