i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
