either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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