hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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