I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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