it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
