if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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