Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just want to make out with him forever
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight