apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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