She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
