and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize