i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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