8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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