i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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